YAFACP (Yet Another F'in Awesome Craigslist Post)

[kmax]

This could top the best roomate one.

http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/doc/ ... 37459.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

you hit me with your electric wheelchair so i challenge you to a duel - 29 (Giant in Columbia Heights Washington DC)

Hello sir,

My name is Ben and at about 8pm tonight (1/17/12) you ran directly into me with your electric wheelchair in front of the Giant in Columbia Heights, DC.

Allow me to illustrate what exactly happened that was so be-fuddling and anger inducing that it would inspire me to create a "missed connection" post on Craigslist.

After a long day at work, I entered the aforementioned Giant in our wonderful nation's capital. All I needed were paper towels. I purchased said paper towels and was on my merry way home only to be caught in a pedestrian traffic jam of sorts at the entrance of the grocery store. After avoiding disaster and taking a sigh of relief, my eyes were suddenly affixed upon an middle-aged gentleman about four to five feet away from me in an electric wheelchair hellbent on taking me out. That gentleman was you, sir. Not only did you run directly into me, but I consequently fell directly onto you, and then off your wheelchair, and then onto the ground.

Now, what for lack of better words "pisses me the f*ck off" is the fact that you threw up your hands like you were just attacked by a pack of rabid penguins. What "pisses me the f*ck off" even more is the fact that all the on-lookers immediately ran to your side to see if you were "okay." Don't mind me. It's all gravy. Getting hit by people in electric wheelchairs is apparently a normally occurring thing in everyday life. Moreover, I get that you are handicapped for whatever reason and need an electric wheelchair to do whatever it is you do, but in my years of living I've gathered that by now electric wheelchairs have the ability to stop as well as go.

One more thing. I have a broken toe on my right foot. You managed to not only run over that, but my left foot as well, which now feels like it was just hit by an inconsiderate handicapped guy in an electric wheelchair in front of a Giant in Washington, DC (see what I did there?). Anyway, I am currently working as a day manager and head bartender at a bar/nightclub. This job requires me to constantly be quick on my feet and run up and down stairs daily to make sure things run smoothly. Now pardon my language sir, but how the f*ck am I going to explain to my bosses and fellow employees that I cannot perform up to expectations because I got "hit by a guy in an electric wheelchair." These kinds of things not only sound made-up, but make me look like a straight up punk b*tch, and I sir, am not a punk b*tch.

I WILL NOT ACCEPT YOUR GUFF AND DOUCHE-BAGGERY, AND CHALLENGE YOU TO A DUEL.

Judging by the shape of your legs (literally and figuratively), we cannot engage in a cage fight, and sadly duels to the death are no longer considered "legal." The only fair compromise is that I buy an electric wheelchair myself and we joust. If you accept these terms, I demand we meet in front of the same Giant at the date of your choosing, preferably at sunrise so I can still make it to work after I f*ck your ****** up.

I do not care if I miss rent next month, or my cell phone gets cut off. I will use all the money I make to make this happen in order to make things right in this already sad world. The gauntlet has been thrown.

Consider your couch f*cked,
Ben

P.S. - I hate you.

[HelenaCat95]

I would pay for that on pay per view.

[CapitalCityCat]

That is AWESOME!

You managed to not only run over that, but my left foot as well, which now feels like it was just hit by an inconsiderate handicapped guy in an electric wheelchair in front of a Giant in Washington, DC (see what I did there?).

[wbtfg]

Dear Ben,

I read your cute little letter on craigslist, which I'm sure all your cute little friends think is really funny, but I feel the need to clarify.

About 5 years ago I lost much of my eyesight when an IED exploded near my face while I was serving YOUR country in Iraq. My apologies for running into you, but it was dark out and I simply didn't see you in my path.

At this same time, I also lost my ability to walk when shrapnel lodged in my spinal cord. Because of this event, as well as other gruesome events that I witnessed I am suffering from PTSD, which is one of the reasons I involuntary acted the way I did after the collision.

As you mentioned many times in your letter, I can no longer walk...unfortunately, due to this handicap I have lost my job as well as my wife , so you'll understand if I don't feel sorry that you now temporally walk with a limp and are unable to bound around your bar with the grace and flair of a University of Montana dancer.

I'm happy to engage you in a duel, and in fact, I kind of hope that you finish me off, as I'm not sure life is still worth living.

Respectfully yours,

SGT Tom Johnson
United States Marine Corps.

[kmax]

Dang, wbtfg with utter and complete buzzkill.

[wbtfg]

Dang, wbtfg with utter and complete buzzkill.

Sorry...I generally really like the CL ads (especially the roommate one), but this one really rubbed me the wrong way. Sounded like a entitled, whiney, spoiled douche who just drove his brand new scion back from an occupy Wall Street rally.

[kmax]

Dang, wbtfg with utter and complete buzzkill.

Sorry...I generally really like the CL ads (especially the roommate one), but this one really rubbed me the wrong way. Sounded like a entitled, whiney, spoiled douche who just drove his brand new scion back from an occupy Wall Street rally.

Me thinks you took it a little (lot) more seriously than it was intended. But to each their own, will let this one die now I guess.

[wbtfg]

Dang, wbtfg with utter and complete buzzkill.

Sorry...I generally really like the CL ads (especially the roommate one), but this one really rubbed me the wrong way. Sounded like a entitled, whiney, spoiled douche who just drove his brand new scion back from an occupy Wall Street rally.

Me thinks you took it a little (lot) more seriously than it was intended. But to each their own, will let this one die know I guess.

No need to let it die. I fully admit I took it WAAAAY too seriously...I'm probably just bitter that it's not beer :30 yet.



Sorry for derailing.....

[kmax]

Dang, wbtfg with utter and complete buzzkill.

Sorry...I generally really like the CL ads (especially the roommate one), but this one really rubbed me the wrong way. Sounded like a entitled, whiney, spoiled douche who just drove his brand new scion back from an occupy Wall Street rally.

Me thinks you took it a little (lot) more seriously than it was intended. But to each their own, will let this one die know I guess.

No need to let it die. I fully admit I took it WAAAAY too seriously...I'm probably just bitter that it's not beer :30 yet.



Sorry for derailing.....

Funny you should mention that, my original response to yours was telling everyone here to go home beer:30 was canceled.

[CapitalCityCat]

What are the odds that two totally random, yet interconnected people in the DC Metro area would both be searching the Missed Connections link on Craigslist?

Yet, after reading the reply, I still think the original post was awesome.

[kmax]

What are the odds that two totally random, yet interconnected people in the DC Metro area would both be searching the Missed Connections link on Craigslist?

Yet, after reading the reply, I still think the original post was awesome.

I'm pretty sure wbtfg wrote the reply, not that it was an actual craigslist reply thus my slightly shocked reaction. (just guessing off of the inclusion of the "grace and flair of a University of Montana dancer" comment)

[Billings Cat]

Dear Ben,

I read your cute little letter on craigslist, which I'm sure all your cute little friends think is really funny, but I feel the need to clarify.

About 5 years ago I lost much of my eyesight when an IED exploded near my face while I was serving YOUR country in Iraq. My apologies for running into you, but it was dark out and I simply didn't see you in my path.

At this same time, I also lost my ability to walk when shrapnel lodged in my spinal cord. Because of this event, as well as other gruesome events that I witnessed I am suffering from PTSD, which is one of the reasons I involuntary acted the way I did after the collision.

As you mentioned many times in your letter, I can no longer walk...unfortunately, due to this handicap I have lost my job as well as my wife , so you'll understand if I don't feel sorry that you now temporally walk with a limp and are unable to bound around your bar with the grace and flair of a University of Montana dancer.

I'm happy to engage you in a duel, and in fact, I kind of hope that you finish me off, as I'm not sure life is still worth living.

Respectfully yours,

SGT Tom Johnson
United States Marine Corps.

Lame, lame, lame

[Cat Grad]

I know people that think dwarf bowling is funny. I even had somebody in my vehicle laughing at a pickup that went in the ditch just in front of us until he realized there were two dead. Not really funny.

[tdub]

Has all the snow made everybody cranky? Holy cow. Take some Vitamin D everybody.

[Cat Grad]

Dear Ben,

I read your cute little letter on craigslist, which I'm sure all your cute little friends think is really funny, but I feel the need to clarify.

About 5 years ago I lost much of my eyesight when an IED exploded near my face while I was serving YOUR country in Iraq. My apologies for running into you, but it was dark out and I simply didn't see you in my path.

At this same time, I also lost my ability to walk when shrapnel lodged in my spinal cord. Because of this event, as well as other gruesome events that I witnessed I am suffering from PTSD, which is one of the reasons I involuntary acted the way I did after the collision.

As you mentioned many times in your letter, I can no longer walk...unfortunately, due to this handicap I have lost my job as well as my wife , so you'll understand if I don't feel sorry that you now temporally walk with a limp and are unable to bound around your bar with the grace and flair of a University of Montana dancer.

I'm happy to engage you in a duel, and in fact, I kind of hope that you finish me off, as I'm not sure life is still worth living.

Respectfully yours,

SGT Tom Johnson
United States Marine Corps.

Lame, lame, lame

I bet you're all pizzed off at the jarheads pizzing on a dead taliban?

[kmax]

Has all the snow made everybody cranky? Holy cow. Take some Vitamin D everybody.

No kidding.

[wbtfg]

Has all the snow made everybody cranky? Holy cow. Take some Vitamin D everybody.

No kidding.

Up yers



I keed, I keed.

[CapitalCityCat]

What are the odds that two totally random, yet interconnected people in the DC Metro area would both be searching the Missed Connections link on Craigslist?

Yet, after reading the reply, I still think the original post was awesome.

I'm pretty sure wbtfg wrote the reply, not that it was an actual craigslist reply thus my slightly shocked reaction. (just guessing off of the inclusion of the "grace and flair of a University of Montana dancer" comment)

obviously I didn't bother to read the entire reply!

[LongTimeCatFan]

Dear Ben,

I read your cute little letter on craigslist, which I'm sure all your cute little friends think is really funny, but I feel the need to clarify.

About 5 years ago I lost much of my eyesight when an IED exploded near my face while I was serving YOUR country in Iraq. My apologies for running into you, but it was dark out and I simply didn't see you in my path.

At this same time, I also lost my ability to walk when shrapnel lodged in my spinal cord. Because of this event, as well as other gruesome events that I witnessed I am suffering from PTSD, which is one of the reasons I involuntary acted the way I did after the collision.

As you mentioned many times in your letter, I can no longer walk...unfortunately, due to this handicap I have lost my job as well as my wife , so you'll understand if I don't feel sorry that you now temporally walk with a limp and are unable to bound around your bar with the grace and flair of a University of Montana dancer.

I'm happy to engage you in a duel, and in fact, I kind of hope that you finish me off, as I'm not sure life is still worth living.

Respectfully yours,

SGT Tom Johnson
United States Marine Corps.

Lame, lame, lame

I bet you're all pizzed off at the jarheads pizzing on a dead taliban?

I'm sure you're surprised, but no I'm not. Its just unfortunate that those pics leaked out.

[The Butcher]

I'm sure you're surprised, but no I'm not. Its just unfortunate that those pics leaked out.

Nice...