Silent Saturday: Soccer
Posted: Thu Sep 21, 2023 8:11 pm
Lots of parents going ballistic over this.
That's kind of where I'm at as well. Kids don't need people yelling "pass it" "run!" "shoot!" all game long....whether it's coaches or parents.
Here's a more thorough explanation of the goals and methodology behind the idea. I'm on the fence about what I think of it, but this description makes more sense than what I had initially interpreted.kennethnoisewater wrote: ↑Fri Sep 22, 2023 11:05 amI can't see it having the desired effect, at least in the short run. The parents who are problematic aren't going to sit through this tournament and self-reflect, then make changes. They're going to go right outside the fence and scream louder. Or they're going to get on Facebook (already seen a lot of this) and say how stupid this is. Then the next tournament they're just going to be more belligerent. If there are more tournaments like this, I'm afraid you'll see more parents just guiding their kids away from soccer.
Listen, I think almost every problem we have in sports can be traced back to parents who don't get it. I'm a former coach and AD, and parents are the biggest nightmare to deal with, bar none. Something has to be done, but I don't think this is it. I'm all for trying it, because experimenting is better than sitting around and complaining about it.
I'm curious what the kids think about it. What do they think about the concept now, and how will they like it during and after? I will always advocate for coaches and officials, because their job is thankless. However, this strikes me as more for the coaches and refs than it is for the kids. Or it's an exercise for parents who need to get their priorities in order. I just think the parents who are going to respond well to it are the ones you don't have a problem with anyway.
Some the best and most positive sporting events were just post-Covid when spectators were still not allowed in the gym. The kids could play freely, coaches could coach and refs were not subject to abuse.kennethnoisewater wrote: ↑Fri Sep 22, 2023 11:05 amI can't see it having the desired effect, at least in the short run. The parents who are problematic aren't going to sit through this tournament and self-reflect, then make changes. They're going to go right outside the fence and scream louder. Or they're going to get on Facebook (already seen a lot of this) and say how stupid this is. Then the next tournament they're just going to be more belligerent. If there are more tournaments like this, I'm afraid you'll see more parents just guiding their kids away from soccer.
Listen, I think almost every problem we have in sports can be traced back to parents who don't get it. I'm a former coach and AD, and parents are the biggest nightmare to deal with, bar none. Something has to be done, but I don't think this is it. I'm all for trying it, because experimenting is better than sitting around and complaining about it.
I'm curious what the kids think about it. What do they think about the concept now, and how will they like it during and after? I will always advocate for coaches and officials, because their job is thankless. However, this strikes me as more for the coaches and refs than it is for the kids. Or it's an exercise for parents who need to get their priorities in order. I just think the parents who are going to respond well to it are the ones you don't have a problem with anyway.
I don’t foresee this going well when it’s announced for ‘Cat/gris football.Cataholic wrote: ↑Fri Sep 22, 2023 11:12 pmSome the best and most positive sporting events were just post-Covid when spectators were still not allowed in the gym. The kids could play freely, coaches could coach and refs were not subject to abuse.kennethnoisewater wrote: ↑Fri Sep 22, 2023 11:05 amI can't see it having the desired effect, at least in the short run. The parents who are problematic aren't going to sit through this tournament and self-reflect, then make changes. They're going to go right outside the fence and scream louder. Or they're going to get on Facebook (already seen a lot of this) and say how stupid this is. Then the next tournament they're just going to be more belligerent. If there are more tournaments like this, I'm afraid you'll see more parents just guiding their kids away from soccer.
Listen, I think almost every problem we have in sports can be traced back to parents who don't get it. I'm a former coach and AD, and parents are the biggest nightmare to deal with, bar none. Something has to be done, but I don't think this is it. I'm all for trying it, because experimenting is better than sitting around and complaining about it.
I'm curious what the kids think about it. What do they think about the concept now, and how will they like it during and after? I will always advocate for coaches and officials, because their job is thankless. However, this strikes me as more for the coaches and refs than it is for the kids. Or it's an exercise for parents who need to get their priorities in order. I just think the parents who are going to respond well to it are the ones you don't have a problem with anyway.
Some parents are awful like that. Not all parents.hokeyfine wrote: ↑Tue Sep 26, 2023 1:26 pmas a former parent to young kids(they are in their 30's now) , former referee for soccer, and bball coach for AAU, I think this is a great idea. Anything to get the parents away from the kids sporting events. Parents are the worse thing to happen to organized sports. I can't tell you how many times as a coach and referee that i've had to stop games and go to the sidelines and tell parents to shut up. i've had parents run out of the stands and tell me what play to call.......
If it wasn't for parents willing to travel with their kids and spend money there would be no AAU type ball. So while parents can be the problem, without them we are back to neighborhood leagues for kids sports. Level of play in college is so much better and a lof that is due to amount kids travel and play now.hokeyfine wrote: ↑Tue Sep 26, 2023 1:26 pmas a former parent to young kids(they are in their 30's now) , former referee for soccer, and bball coach for AAU, I think this is a great idea. Anything to get the parents away from the kids sporting events. Parents are the worse thing to happen to organized sports. I can't tell you how many times as a coach and referee that i've had to stop games and go to the sidelines and tell parents to shut up. i've had parents run out of the stands and tell me what play to call.......
I'll add my 2 cents here on this comment. I think you are right about this, though potentially debatable on if this has gone too far as well for kids but that is a different topic. But yes, without the parents being willing to both fund and enable kids to be on teams like this it wouldn't happen. BUT the problem is that parents need to understand that this is where their responsibility ends. Parents are responsible for the kids outside the lines, getting them there and making sure they keep up with everything they need to outside of the sport. Once they step on the court/pitch/field/whatever your turn to tell them what to do turns off for a few short hours. Unless you are gonna step up and coach or referee yourself, your sole responsibility as a parent is to support your kid in a positive manner during those hours when they are participating. Just because you paid for equipment, paid for travel and took time away for the travel does not grant you the rights to be a coach, referee or teammate (or a critic of any of the above). Sit back and enjoy watching your kid take part in the activity, trust me in the blink of an eye that time will be gone and you'll wish you'd spent a bit more time enjoying it and a bit less time complaining about the things you had no control over anyway.tetoncat wrote: ↑Wed Sep 27, 2023 10:27 amIf it wasn't for parents willing to travel with their kids and spend money there would be no AAU type ball. So while parents can be the problem, without them we are back to neighborhood leagues for kids sports. Level of play in college is so much better and a lof that is due to amount kids travel and play now.hokeyfine wrote: ↑Tue Sep 26, 2023 1:26 pmas a former parent to young kids(they are in their 30's now) , former referee for soccer, and bball coach for AAU, I think this is a great idea. Anything to get the parents away from the kids sporting events. Parents are the worse thing to happen to organized sports. I can't tell you how many times as a coach and referee that i've had to stop games and go to the sidelines and tell parents to shut up. i've had parents run out of the stands and tell me what play to call.......
All fair points, I guess I just think if the group that wants silent gets that completely it will end up being a step back for clubsports. Maybe that needs to happen, but some of those same parents will then be first to complain as well.kmax wrote: ↑Wed Sep 27, 2023 12:10 pmI'll add my 2 cents here on this comment. I think you are right about this, though potentially debatable on if this has gone too far as well for kids but that is a different topic. But yes, without the parents being willing to both fund and enable kids to be on teams like this it wouldn't happen. BUT the problem is that parents need to understand that this is where their responsibility ends. Parents are responsible for the kids outside the lines, getting them there and making sure they keep up with everything they need to outside of the sport. Once they step on the court/pitch/field/whatever your turn to tell them what to do turns off for a few short hours. Unless you are gonna step up and coach or referee yourself, your sole responsibility as a parent is to support your kid in a positive manner during those hours when they are participating. Just because you paid for equipment, paid for travel and took time away for the travel does not grant you the rights to be a coach, referee or teammate (or a critic of any of the above). Sit back and enjoy watching your kid take part in the activity, trust me in the blink of an eye that time will be gone and you'll wish you'd spent a bit more time enjoying it and a bit less time complaining about the things you had no control over anyway.tetoncat wrote: ↑Wed Sep 27, 2023 10:27 amIf it wasn't for parents willing to travel with their kids and spend money there would be no AAU type ball. So while parents can be the problem, without them we are back to neighborhood leagues for kids sports. Level of play in college is so much better and a lof that is due to amount kids travel and play now.hokeyfine wrote: ↑Tue Sep 26, 2023 1:26 pmas a former parent to young kids(they are in their 30's now) , former referee for soccer, and bball coach for AAU, I think this is a great idea. Anything to get the parents away from the kids sporting events. Parents are the worse thing to happen to organized sports. I can't tell you how many times as a coach and referee that i've had to stop games and go to the sidelines and tell parents to shut up. i've had parents run out of the stands and tell me what play to call.......
And to be clear I'm not necessarily advocating for the whole Silent Saturday thing. I get what they are trying to do, namely the above that I just spelled out, but I do think it might be a bit too much. I'm not sure I like the lack of cheering or the coach not being able to coach in game but as someone else said seeing the actual policy that someone posted I don't mind the idea near as much as I did when I just heard the cliffs notes version going around in the news.
All of that I can completely agree with and am of exactly the same mind.tetoncat wrote: ↑Wed Sep 27, 2023 12:28 pmAll fair points, I guess I just think if the group that wants silent gets that completely it will end up being a step back for clubsports. Maybe that needs to happen, but some of those same parents will then be first to complain as well.kmax wrote: ↑Wed Sep 27, 2023 12:10 pmI'll add my 2 cents here on this comment. I think you are right about this, though potentially debatable on if this has gone too far as well for kids but that is a different topic. But yes, without the parents being willing to both fund and enable kids to be on teams like this it wouldn't happen. BUT the problem is that parents need to understand that this is where their responsibility ends. Parents are responsible for the kids outside the lines, getting them there and making sure they keep up with everything they need to outside of the sport. Once they step on the court/pitch/field/whatever your turn to tell them what to do turns off for a few short hours. Unless you are gonna step up and coach or referee yourself, your sole responsibility as a parent is to support your kid in a positive manner during those hours when they are participating. Just because you paid for equipment, paid for travel and took time away for the travel does not grant you the rights to be a coach, referee or teammate (or a critic of any of the above). Sit back and enjoy watching your kid take part in the activity, trust me in the blink of an eye that time will be gone and you'll wish you'd spent a bit more time enjoying it and a bit less time complaining about the things you had no control over anyway.tetoncat wrote: ↑Wed Sep 27, 2023 10:27 amIf it wasn't for parents willing to travel with their kids and spend money there would be no AAU type ball. So while parents can be the problem, without them we are back to neighborhood leagues for kids sports. Level of play in college is so much better and a lof that is due to amount kids travel and play now.hokeyfine wrote: ↑Tue Sep 26, 2023 1:26 pmas a former parent to young kids(they are in their 30's now) , former referee for soccer, and bball coach for AAU, I think this is a great idea. Anything to get the parents away from the kids sporting events. Parents are the worse thing to happen to organized sports. I can't tell you how many times as a coach and referee that i've had to stop games and go to the sidelines and tell parents to shut up. i've had parents run out of the stands and tell me what play to call.......
And to be clear I'm not necessarily advocating for the whole Silent Saturday thing. I get what they are trying to do, namely the above that I just spelled out, but I do think it might be a bit too much. I'm not sure I like the lack of cheering or the coach not being able to coach in game but as someone else said seeing the actual policy that someone posted I don't mind the idea near as much as I did when I just heard the cliffs notes version going around in the news.
Leagues need to control it more. No coaching makes no sense, too much coaching also makes no sense. There is enough cameras these days. If coach or parent is out of line league board can suspend or ban them. Do that enough maybe it self controls the activity.
Amen to that last statement! I wouldn’t take anything for what used to be a dusty vacant lot full of weeds on S. 11th near Dickerson. It wasn’t leveled and it was never irrigated or mowed. But a couple dads at some time nailed down a wooden home plate (bloody knee magnet), and set three old wood posts to make a very rough backstop of re-used planks. A whole lot of us baby-boomers learned how to play baseball there, and went on to play team or recreational sports for many years after. Quality of life isn’t always watered and mowed. We loved that place. Then somebody built a house in it.HelenaCat95 wrote: ↑Wed Sep 27, 2023 1:44 pmNo coaching/cheering makes no sense, and too much coaching/cheering makes no sense. But each kids development/maturity responds to different methods. And a one size fits all model doesn't make sense either. A good coach will coach different players, differently. Complete silence doesn't allow that.
I suggest that if the goal of this is to have the kids have some "free play" where they organize themselves, then drop the kids off at a park and just let them play.
thats a very good 2 cents.kmax wrote: ↑Wed Sep 27, 2023 12:10 pmI'll add my 2 cents here on this comment. I think you are right about this, though potentially debatable on if this has gone too far as well for kids but that is a different topic. But yes, without the parents being willing to both fund and enable kids to be on teams like this it wouldn't happen. BUT the problem is that parents need to understand that this is where their responsibility ends. Parents are responsible for the kids outside the lines, getting them there and making sure they keep up with everything they need to outside of the sport. Once they step on the court/pitch/field/whatever your turn to tell them what to do turns off for a few short hours. Unless you are gonna step up and coach or referee yourself, your sole responsibility as a parent is to support your kid in a positive manner during those hours when they are participating. Just because you paid for equipment, paid for travel and took time away for the travel does not grant you the rights to be a coach, referee or teammate (or a critic of any of the above). Sit back and enjoy watching your kid take part in the activity, trust me in the blink of an eye that time will be gone and you'll wish you'd spent a bit more time enjoying it and a bit less time complaining about the things you had no control over anyway.tetoncat wrote: ↑Wed Sep 27, 2023 10:27 amIf it wasn't for parents willing to travel with their kids and spend money there would be no AAU type ball. So while parents can be the problem, without them we are back to neighborhood leagues for kids sports. Level of play in college is so much better and a lof that is due to amount kids travel and play now.hokeyfine wrote: ↑Tue Sep 26, 2023 1:26 pmas a former parent to young kids(they are in their 30's now) , former referee for soccer, and bball coach for AAU, I think this is a great idea. Anything to get the parents away from the kids sporting events. Parents are the worse thing to happen to organized sports. I can't tell you how many times as a coach and referee that i've had to stop games and go to the sidelines and tell parents to shut up. i've had parents run out of the stands and tell me what play to call.......
And to be clear I'm not necessarily advocating for the whole Silent Saturday thing. I get what they are trying to do, namely the above that I just spelled out, but I do think it might be a bit too much. I'm not sure I like the lack of cheering or the coach not being able to coach in game but as someone else said seeing the actual policy that someone posted I don't mind the idea near as much as I did when I just heard the cliffs notes version going around in the news.
Those terrible parents and coaches have no interest in complying. They feel entitled to act that way and feel “wronged” if asked to act differently. These leagues don’t make big money and are usually run by volunteers who don’t want to deal with each of these difficult people. That results in the one size fits all approach of punishing everyone.hokeyfine wrote: ↑Wed Sep 27, 2023 3:11 pmthats a very good 2 cents.kmax wrote: ↑Wed Sep 27, 2023 12:10 pmI'll add my 2 cents here on this comment. I think you are right about this, though potentially debatable on if this has gone too far as well for kids but that is a different topic. But yes, without the parents being willing to both fund and enable kids to be on teams like this it wouldn't happen. BUT the problem is that parents need to understand that this is where their responsibility ends. Parents are responsible for the kids outside the lines, getting them there and making sure they keep up with everything they need to outside of the sport. Once they step on the court/pitch/field/whatever your turn to tell them what to do turns off for a few short hours. Unless you are gonna step up and coach or referee yourself, your sole responsibility as a parent is to support your kid in a positive manner during those hours when they are participating. Just because you paid for equipment, paid for travel and took time away for the travel does not grant you the rights to be a coach, referee or teammate (or a critic of any of the above). Sit back and enjoy watching your kid take part in the activity, trust me in the blink of an eye that time will be gone and you'll wish you'd spent a bit more time enjoying it and a bit less time complaining about the things you had no control over anyway.tetoncat wrote: ↑Wed Sep 27, 2023 10:27 amIf it wasn't for parents willing to travel with their kids and spend money there would be no AAU type ball. So while parents can be the problem, without them we are back to neighborhood leagues for kids sports. Level of play in college is so much better and a lof that is due to amount kids travel and play now.hokeyfine wrote: ↑Tue Sep 26, 2023 1:26 pmas a former parent to young kids(they are in their 30's now) , former referee for soccer, and bball coach for AAU, I think this is a great idea. Anything to get the parents away from the kids sporting events. Parents are the worse thing to happen to organized sports. I can't tell you how many times as a coach and referee that i've had to stop games and go to the sidelines and tell parents to shut up. i've had parents run out of the stands and tell me what play to call.......
And to be clear I'm not necessarily advocating for the whole Silent Saturday thing. I get what they are trying to do, namely the above that I just spelled out, but I do think it might be a bit too much. I'm not sure I like the lack of cheering or the coach not being able to coach in game but as someone else said seeing the actual policy that someone posted I don't mind the idea near as much as I did when I just heard the cliffs notes version going around in the news.
banning bad parents and coaches is a great idea, until those parents and coaches become board members of the clubs and organizations.